The Dreaded Imposter Syndrome

It’s happened to all of us. You get promoted. You get your dream job. You get put in leadership. Or you win the starting job. Now what? If your first question is, “I hope no one notices that I am not good at this…” you are not alone. It has a name. It’s called imposter syndrome. My own uncle brags all the time that he only keeps his high powered, high profile job as an attorney for 5 years on purpose, before everyone finds out that he doesn’t know what he is doing. Then he moves to the next department, firm, or opportunity and starts over. If you have ever told yourself “you are a fraud”, or “it’s just luck”, or “I’m just waiting for people to find out that I am in the wrong ball park”. You may have imposter syndrome. If your parents praised you growing up by telling you how amazing you are, how smart you are, or how talented you are. You may suffer from imposter syndrome.

Now that you know what it is, what do you do about it? An article on imposter syndrome from Psychology Today gives us some solid ideas.

First of all, know that you are ok. I work with a lot of professional, world class, elite, and collegiate athletes. Imposter syndrome is much more common that you think. In fact, studies that over 70% of you reading this article have suffered from Imposter syndrome. If you haven’t, your time may be coming.

Second, remind yourself of all that you’ve accomplished. It’s important to realize imposter syndrome and egomania are on different ends of the spectrum. Most people with imposter syndrome have no idea where egomania lives. So do this. Read an old letter of recommendation, look at your resume, or if you’ve been given an award, read the inscription. Typically, this is a good reminder of all the efforts you have made to be in the situation you are in.

Thirdly. Tell a trusted friend. This can be a lift to your spirit. Side note = don’t tell too many people….messages can get jumbled if we include to many people in our lives to help us solve problems.

Fourth. Teach. Simpy teaching the skills that you are being asked to incorporate can sometimes help you to realize that you know more than you thought. Teaching others can help you realize how far you’ve come by teaching and nurturing the next generation.

Fifth. Remember that its ok not to know what you are doing. When you are enthusiastic about learning a new skill, or about a new situation, more often than not, others will cut you the slack that you deserve.

Sixth. If you have children, praise effort. Phrases like “you worked really hard for that!”, or “I love it that you didn’t give up” can be especially beneficial to young people who are trying to fight imposter syndrome. It can also help you to realize that you have worked hard to where you are at. You never gave up. You hung with it when that inner voice told you to quit.

Seventh. Anticipate failure. When you give your kid a bike, say things like, “to be good on this bike, you have to fall at least 10 times.” Or label every new piece of work “A terrible first draft.” This gives you an out, and an understanding that you are a work in progress. The faster you embrace this, the better you will become.

Lastly, don’t forget that you work in a world with a bunch of imposters as well. My guess is, that more than half of the people around you are faking it, just like you. In other words, you are a unique individual, just like everybody else.

As Billy Jean King so wisely stated, “Pressure Is a Privilege, it only comes to those who earn it.” Embrace the awesome of your situation. Be grateful for the opportunity. Your success will be determined by how you react to your current situation. And you always have control over how you react.

Riley Jensen is currently the Lead Mental Peformance Coach for Real Salt Lake, a mental performance coach for Utah State University Athletics, a mental performance coach for Weber State University Athletics, for various professional Ski Teams, and for the Utah Jazz Ticket Sales organization. He is available for corporate, team, and individual sessions. You can find more information about Riley at www.rileyjensenconsulting.com. You can find him on Twitter: @rileyjensen, Instagram:@rjperformancegroup, and Facebook: RJ Performance Group. You can also listen to his podcast here: Riley Jensen, Mindset Matters Podcast